If you’re just starting a long-distance relationship and want to maintain the intensity, or you’ve been in one for some time and want to spark things up, we’re here to help. Our long-distance-love cupids have pulled together five tips that are sure to keep the faraway fire not just burning but roaring. So, let’s fan those flames and get the two of you worked up into delightfully distanced balls of quivering anticipation, shall we?
1. A surprise dildo delivery (and more)
So let’s make one thing clear. For this long-distance relationship to really take off, you’re going to have to make it a threesome. That is, you need a dildo (at least one!) in this love triangle. You can tease each other all you want. You can talk your brains out. But when it comes down to maintaining the excitement, you’re both going to want some serious sexual satisfaction.
Enter the dildo.
This friend with benefits will be able to physically deliver what no amount of sexy Zoom time will ever achieve. Of course, you can enjoy all the foreplay imaginable, but a long-distance relationship is, alas, devoid of physical contact. Your well stocked pleasure chest of thrusting dildo, however, is physically present and ready to make this moment memorable. If you’re already familiar with your partner’s taste and you know they’re comfortable with a dildo, then it won’t be a problem for you to select a nice little (err, maybe not so little?!) surprise and post it on its merry way.
Maybe you can even select several dildos, so they have one for different days, different role plays, different moods. To see the different types of dildoes check out PleasureChest, they have a huge range that you can choose from. Now, if your partner is new to the dildo scene, or you are not really sure it’s their thing, then start softly-softly.
Maybe you can package it up in a bundle of gifts? Perhaps you can lay it in a box of roses? However make sure you accompany it with a sexy note, a letter of love, a cute polaroid with a bespoke message on the back… You get the picture. Make your dildo delivery stand out for more than one reason. Then get ready for the fun times to flow…
2. Take out – for two
OK, so the dildo has arrived, so what about a special night in to celebrate? Why don’t you both agree to a restaurant dinner, with each of you selecting a home delivery for the other? Why not keep the element of anticipation alive and decide on your partner’s menu without them knowing? Each of you can book Deliveroo or Uber Eats and have a romantic meal delivered to your respective doors. One of you might end up with burgers; the other might be sitting down to French fare. Add your favourite tipple to ease up any inhibitions…
Who cares – the magic is in the element of surprise, and the proof is most definitely in the pudding! Set up a Zoom, set the table and settle in. And don’t forget there’s a dildo for dessert… With a night in like this, you’re raising the bar in long-distance loving. Couples who see each other every night of the week will be wanting tips.
3. Movie night
How much do we love modern technology? On the one hand, you can watch Netflix from your laptop; on the other, you can share the moment on your phone. And that’s exactly what you can both do to keep this long-distance relationship firing on all cylinders. It’s Friday night; you’ve both worked yourselves to the max. It’s time for downtime, which is definitely going to take you straight to sexy time. Maybe one of you prefers their TV time in a hot, soapy bath? Maybe on the couch wrapped in just a t-shirt?
Whatever your version of Gold Class, get a ticket now. Whether it’s a porn film, an indy European sexy film or that TV series you both absolutely love, press play and watch this together. Just be sure to keep that dildo very handy…
4. Be spontaneous
A big certainty in this relationship is the tyranny of distance. So why not laugh in its forlorn face with a big slice of spontaneity? Sprinkle that spicy fairy dust! Is your special someone a creature of habit who starts their day in the same cafe at the same time? Call the venue, pay for their coffee and have the barista write a little sexy something on the cup. Deliver something to their workplace. Unless they’re a secret agent, then an impromptu delivery of flowers, chocolates, a singing balloon artist or anything in-between to their workplace is going to make them feel the centre of attention and send excitement levels into overdrive.
Do they deserve a bit of pampering? You can’t run your hands over their body, so why not hand it over to a professional? Book them in for a massage or a facial; just make sure the dildo isn’t involved this time (or maybe you should make sure – your call!). Leave a message on their phone when you know they can’t take the call. Be sexy, confident, irresistible. Hang on – the dildo is definitely needed now…!
5. Plan your next encounter (and pack the dildo!)
When you’re in a long-distance relationship, all you want to do is decrease the distance, right? So keep the both of you frothing by planning what lies ahead. Where will you meet? What will you each be wearing? Who’s going to speak or act first, and what will they say or do? How long before you kiss, and is that dildo going to subtly sneak its sexy way back into this scenario? You can only hope, right…?!
Whatever the fantasy the two of you build, fill it with delectable detail. Describe how you’re going to unbutton that shirt. Explain in detail just how you’re going to serve them that bowl of ice cream. Tell them how that dildo will feel when you’re the one holding it instead of them.
Buckle up – you’re in for quite the reunion.