julia dream, dreamboat queen, queen of all my dreams

pardon me for saying so but you look more pitiful
than I had ever imagined, despite perfect fashion and
your photographs depict you so differently
I always thought you would be some sort of match for me.

so, let's decide who can survive
stomping feet and racing beats
of hearts that don't ever slow.
then I'll write letters on white paper
expressing my deep disappointment.

dripping where I stand from my watery hands
hoping to get past the open bedroom door
where her clothes on the floor
remind me of our conversations
the feeling of slight hesitation
to turn out the lights.

14 days now since we started (I'm not)
to complicate the situation (I'm not hiding from this situation)
I'm not hiding (I'm not)
I'm just buying some time for us to find the back door (I'm not hiding from this situation)
we will come out when it's safe for us
when it's safe for us
when it's safe for us, us
for us all.

there's nothing left to say (don't believe me when I say it's over)
to excuse the way that I've behaved
I still feel him
gripping like a stain to this fabric (by the time you're gone it's all uncovered)
torn in every seam
then thrown away.

(one without regret, I will not forget
one without regret, I will not forget)

why should I take all the blame for my mistakes? (one without regret)
you were there with every promise made to break (I will not forget)
when did you become the one without regret? (one without regret)
kill me, burn me down, I swear I won't forget (I will not forget)
when did you become the one without regret? (kill me, kill me, kill me)
kill me, burn me down, I swear I won't forget. (kill me, kill me)

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