I CRY EVERYDAY BECAUSE I MISS YOU.

FOLLOW YOUR HEART.

“Follow your heart,”
She said in her sincere voice.
But how can I?
It has hurt me so much.
I cannot love again,
I cannot hope.

“It teaches you about yourself,”
She insisted, right as usual.
But how can I?
I have no choice, no free will.
I cannot be hurt again,
I cannot dream.

“Otherwise you’ll never be happy,”
She told me, with a smile.
But how can I?
Angrily, I told her
Love cannot do anything for me,
And soon she’ll see my point of view.

I hung up.
Tears sprang in my eyes.
I knew she was right.
I knew my heart knew best.

No.

My mind battled.
Strong and firm,
It was the voice of all reason,
Of all truth.

No.

My heart argued.
Thumping and obstinate,
It was the voice of all feelings,
Of all truth.

How could this be?
Was the heart winning again?
Was she right?
Closing my eyes,
I let my mind rest,
And my heart rule.

“Follow your heart,”
She’d said.
“It teaches you about yourself,”
She’d said.
“Otherwise you’ll never be happy,”
She’d said.

And she was right.
Rather my suffering be pure,
Rather it be true,
Than hiding the truth from my own self,
Than denying all feeling.

I’m sorry.
I really am.
But I cannot forget you.
Not now, not ever.
Maybe, in time, the wounds may close,
Maybe, in time.
But I’ll never forget you.
The scars will remain,
But the memories will be sweet.
Bitter-sweet.

More tears.
It’s been a year.
But I still feel for you.
Each time I think about you,
Each time you are online,
My heart beats faster,
My mind goes back to your last kiss.
Last kiss on the cheek.
And I remember the angel you are.
I remember every moment together.
I remember all the suffering,
All the love,
All.
All.
All.

So I’ll follow my heart.
I’ll follow it to the end,
I’ll follow it until my grave.

It WILL hurt,
It WILL kill me,
It WILL destroy me,
It WILL teach me more about myself,
It WILL be the truth,
It WILL be pure.

“Follow your heart,”
She said.
She is right.
As always.
A good friend.
She is right.

FOLLOW YOUR HEART.

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